Exasperated Ex-Belieber

Dear JB,

I am addressing you about my previous affiliations with you and you’re so called fandom. My middle school, and part of my high school career were filled with a lot of confusion and temporary insanity due to you and your ways; many call it Bieber fever. It may have begun in sixth grade, when I saw you on YouTube, it may have been the hair or the angelic voice of an eleven year old girl. I’m not sure what caused me, and millions of other young girls to fall for your ways, maybe you hypnotized us. After I discovered you, I believe; or belieb, I had caught this so called Bieber fever. I hung up posters, six hundred and eight to be exact. I would wait outside Target at midnight waiting for your new album releases. I believe over time the fever got worse, as I met more beliebers I increasingly loved you more and more. I created a twitter account dedicated to you, and spend all of my money on merch. Shirts, tickets, books, CD’s the whole deal. Why would you release all of these objects? To make us more sick? It is inhumane. Whenever you were on TV I had to stop everything I was doing and go straight to the television, I would usually start crying too. Don’t even get my started on the concerts. The concerts not only made me literally vomit from excitement, but they sucked my family dry from money. I believe you owe me at least a college fund, and a half from all of the money I have spent on you. Nothing is worse than the twitter account. See I had my own personal twitter; for my friends from school, but because of you I had to make a separate one for you and my belieber friends. All of the beliebers had an account, I felt obligated to do so aswell. I used the username @PreachBiebs and made it almost impossible for anyone from school to find. After almost a year of tweeting pictures of you and embarrassing fan fiction, a boy who goes by the name of Kevin Okeefe found my twitter account, and decided to present it to the whole school. Not only was in sick, very sick with Bieber fever but the whole school knew it, even more than before. I blame you for this, all of this. It may have been the hair that swooped to the left so elegantly. It may have been the way your jeans were way too tight for your five foot body. It may have been the way you wink, while simultaneously looking like every insane twelve year old girls dream. I deserve a compensation for my sickness, and loss of money due to you. I have since recovered from the fever of you Mr.Bieber, but I suffered strongly. I am asking you simply to reimburse me in some way, I will accept money and or meet and greet tickets.

Yours truly, An Ex Belieber..maybe.